Monday, March 8, 2010

My Ruins


Every day this week, I've listened to the same song. It's a Bebo Norman song entitled "Ruins." There are many things I love about this song, but it is the words of the bridge that keep running through my head:
Let my ruins become the ground you build upon
Let my ruins become the start

Let my ruins become the ground you build it on
From what's left of my broken heart

Because in so many ways, my life is in ruins and my heart is decidedly broken. There have been countless losses over the past couple of years—many of which I wrote about in my New Year's post. And just as I emphasized in that post, there are many good things that have come from these losses. But they are still losses.

Lost relationships.
Lost intimacy.
Lost hopes.
Lost dreams for the future.
Lost familiarity.
Lost clarity.
Lost independence.

They are still losses.

And I am still grieving.

For reasons I don't understand and can't fully name, my grief has been more raw and more overwhelming in recent weeks. I am clinging to the hope that somehow, some way, someday this grieving will give way to healing. And as I long for the time when God will redeem every loss and rebuild it into something beautiful, this will be my prayer:

Oh, God, let my ruins become the ground you build upon.



(I've added the song to the top of my playlist in the right sidebar if you want to hear it.)

1 comment:

  1. hang in there courtney, greif is a hard part of life, but still important.

    ReplyDelete